He may be the most sought after player in soccer right now, but Cristiano Ronaldo gets his ass kicked by David Beckham on the fashion playing field.

Ronnie looked a hot mess at the red carpet of the ESPY Awards in Los Angeles on Wednesday.

From the awful outfit to the shiny face and those shoes, Crissy looked muy malo from head to toe.

It's okay, though. He's young.

We all know Becks had his fare share of fashion missteps back in the day.

Just don't make it a habit, Ronnie!

[Photo via Getty Images.]

We just can't get enough of Zacquisha!

Remember when we first started talking about her????

Here she is, looking like sex on a stick, at the Espy Awards in Los Angeles on Wednesday night.

He sure likes them shiny suits!

[Photo via Getty Images.]

On Tuesday, court docs filed by Cynthia Rodriguez's legal team asked New York Yankee star Alex Rodriguez to hand over any reports that he has "received from a detective, investigator or any other person based upon surveillance" of Cynthia.

A-Rod's lawyer is now telling the media that his client wasn't spying. He says, "Neither Cynthia nor Alex have any surveillance on each other. I would seriously doubt that either one of these parties would do that to each other … they're going through difficult times, but that's just not who they are.

The lawyer man went on to say that C-Rod's attorneys' were just following standard procedure.

Apparently, that's a common thing for divorce attorneys to ask for!

Can you imagine the stuff C-Rod would've uncovered if she was the one doing the spying?!

Juicy!

[Image via WENN.]

Ronnie is here!!!!!!!!!!

He may be out of commission for three months, but that's not gonna stop Crissy from partying!

Manchester United's Cristiano Ronaldo has popped up in Los Angeles.

And the soccer stud is soaking in the local nightlife - crutches and all!

On Tuesday night, Ronnie had din din at hotspot STK and then headed over for some post-grub fun at club Villa.

Tonight, he better stop by our pad for some ballin'!

[Image via WENN.]

Chace Crawford got all pretty for Vitaminwater's MLB All-Star week celebration in NYC on Monday night.

The Gossip Girl's very good friend and real life "roommate" Ed Westwick was conspicuously absent.

Ed avoided the Vitaminwater party and hit up the Dark Knight premiere on the other side of town.

What, they can't be seen at the same place at the same time anymore???

[Photo by Astrid Stawiarz via Getty Images.]

The only thing missing was the Material Girl herself!

Alex Rodriguez hosted an MLB All-Star party at the 40/40 club in NYC on Monday night.

And, who showed up???

Well, Madonna's BFF, Ingrid Casares, and the manager A-Rod shares with Madge, Guy Oseary.

He's in there like swimwear!

[Photos via Getty Images.]

Have cock?

Insert in mouth!

Danity Kane slut Aubrey O'Day took the skankiness up a notch for Vitaminwater's MLB All-Star week celebration in NYC on Monday night.

Letting her titties hang out, the singer wore her sexiest sheet to the soiree and her most Carrie Bradshaw hair accesory.

Maybe Skany is just misunderstood????

She's probably a good Christian girl, like Miley!

[Photo by Astrid Stawiarz via Getty Images.]