The 'real' drama that follows The Hills star Lauren Conrad is better than the 'reality' portrayed in the show!

According to <a href="http://www.accesshollywood.com/article/10332/more-drama-at-the-hills-house-la-building-and-safety-office-investigating-guest-house/
" target="_blank">Access Hollywood, the City of Los Angeles’ Department of Building and Safety is investigating whether or not there is an illegal residence on LC's property.

As y'all know Audrina Patridge lives (lived?) in the back guest house.

However, it appears that the house is not permitted for a second dwelling!

Isn't that something that you should research before you sink loads of money into a house?

Conrad's probably not paying any of it, though. MTV is most likely fronting the bills!

But, wait.

There's more!

A neighborhood snitch reveals that on Sunday morning at around 1:00 am, several cars filled with girls and guys parked outside of LC's house, yelled profanities, honked their horns, and then drove off.

They returned again at 1:30, and again at 1:45, says the source, who witnessed and heard the incident!

We're guessing they must have been Audrina's friends.

How trashy!!

[Image via WENN.]

In a giant "Fuck you!" to me from the universe, I've learned that Audrina Patridge of MTV's The Hills gets paid $10,000 just to show up at clubs and drink. Nobody ever pays me to drink. Though somebody once tried to pay me not to drink. I told them to take their million bucks and scram. NY Daily News reports:

Not only does the contract require the $10k she earned, it also promises that Patridge and her entourage will be well taken care of. The Maxim model, 23, demands "a secure VIP area with complimentary beer, mixed drinks and bottle service (two bottles) and at least one security guard at all times," according to the rider.

If somebody shows up a club screaming "Oh my God, I have to get in! Audrina Patridge is here!", I think the bouncers should legally be allowed to sterilize that person. I dunno, that's just me. Call me crazy, but I'd like to see the human race survive and not be snuffed out in a "poof" of fake tits, lattes and vapid assclowns. Unless that "poof" is the sound of an H-bomb hitting Spencer Pratt in the neck.