Heather Mills… She’s got legs!

Now that Heather Mills has fleeced Paul McCartney, we need to all apologize to Yoko. But then again, John would never have been stupid enough to hook-up with a one-legged soft porn star.

Since scoring $50 million in her divorce settlement with Sir Paul, Heather has been in New York looking to live large. The New York Post has the details:

Mills was spotted looking at condos and, later, partying it up with three girlfriends at Pastis…She looked like a full-on tart. She had on a tight bustier, really tight pants and four-inch-high boots. She looked ready for anything.

Look, pretty much everyone had this chick pegged as a gold digger from the start, so this is no surprise. What I want to know is how you walk around on a fake leg with four-inch-high boots.

Seriously, I’m stumped.

Angelina Jolie will cash in with her uterus.

Would you pay $10 million for a picture of Angelina Jolie’s twins? And no fellas, I don’t mean her tits.

According to National Enquirer editor Barry Levine, pictures of Angelina’s twin babies may command almost $10 million. This is better incentive to squeeze out kids than welfare any ol’ day. The New York Post reveals the obvious:

One magazine editor who asked to remain anonymous said, “It’s at the point now where some stars might decide to have more kids just to collect the money from their photos.”

“It’s become big business now,” Levine said. “It’s outrageous, they’ve gotten very sophisticated. The rights are bought up now even before the celeb enters the hospital. They hire extra security so it’s impossible to obtain a photo illegally.”

Man, I wouldn’t pay $10 million to own those two kids. I mean, what kind of resale value can you get on babies anyway? It’s like driving a car off the lot, right? The older they get, the more money you lose.

Although I have considered adopting this cute 17-year-old Thai girl. It’s a tragic story, really.

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